Almost Gypsy Soul

They say "if we all threw our problems in a pile, we'd look at everyone else's and grab ours back". Its easy to get down on our lives, that everything isn't just perfect, or the way we thought it should be. Maybe we don't have the perfect kids, maybe our dog barks too much, maybe we don't have the family we thought we would, or the job, or the house, maybe we don't live where we thought we should. All in all, these problems are pretty trivial. Its easy to get caught up in what we don't have, but maybe we should look around and be thankful for what we do have. The stuff, the opportunities, the love, the fact that we woke up this morning. Just be thankful because life just isn't that bad. I truly believe we are responsible for our own happiness and although its easy to get stuck in a rut, drug down by negative thoughts. We can overcome our mind by looking for sunshine, looking for good. Its always there, we just gotta open our eyes and hea...

Jealousy is something that I never want to feel of others. I mean sure its there, the small things like I wish I had that snowboard or I wish I could wear those super cute tights and make them look good, but I honestly never, ever want to be so jealous of someone that it makes me miserable. So miserable that I can't see the world really turning outside my head and what I think I know. We know that if we are that miserable with ourselves and our feelings of jealousy....we are bound to be making those around us miserable too. We've all been there at one time or another....the jelouslee and the jealousor and neither one is a fun role to play. Jealously can feel like a lot of different things...it can look like a lot of different things. It looks ridiculous, it looks like low self esteem, if feels like inadequacy, it looks like anger, it feels like humiliation, it feels like high school.  and its a vicious cycle that is tough to break. And when someone is jealous of you? How...

When picking up the book "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People"  I couldn't help but wonder about the effectiveness of the self-help self-discovery book. When I finally took time to set down and start reading, I made it all the way to page 2 of the FORWARD before I realized I'd better be taking some notes because this book was already speaking to me, calling me out on some of my worst fears, traits, etc.....call them what you want. Covey calls them "human challenges". I want it now - people want things and they want them now. Looking for today results because competition is fierce; survival is at stake. How do we balance the need to meet today's demand with the need to invest in capabilities required for tomorrow's success? Some of my favorite quotes: "A thousand mile journey begins with the first step" "borrowing strength builds weakness, it reinforces dependence on external factors" What else is in here to bring m...

time to get my rear in gear. I hardly recognized myself anymore. Things that I used to love to do, like pretty much anything active had been replaced with sedentary activities or even worse food and booze. I found myself being a spectator to life. I didn't feel good about myself, I was embarrassed about the way I looked. I can't even say it was one specific thing, but a picture of me with friends had a lot to do with slapping me in the face. It hasn't been easy and I can't even tell you how long I've been working on it or the last time I had a glass of milk, but none of that matters. What matters is I feel great, I feel like I'm living again, I feel happy, I feel accomplished (but with more to accomplish) and someday I'll be able to drink milk again. (Can you tell I love milk?)

Over the past few months I've learned a lot about who I am and who I want to be. The revelations have come from some very unexpected people and circumstances. Its been stressful, its brought tears and laughter and its been stressful......did I mention its been a bit stressful? And that I'm very thankful for those who have shown , not told me what kind of person I am and continue to strive to be. Although I don't do it often, as in I should go more, I spent some time at Hastings the other day. You just can't beat the rows of books, waiting to tell you a story, surrounded by the warm smell of coffee and its quiet! I ended up picking up a devotional book by Joyce Meyer. Joyce Meyer is a favorite of the Assistant Pack Leader and I decided it was high time I tried one out. Because I've been struggling so much with being strong, standing up for myself and making changes in my life over the past few months what better to help me along than Power Thoughts Devotional ? A...

I'd like to say I have good values. Then you would probably ask me, "Jen, what are your values?". It dawned on me the other day that if someone were to ask me what my values are....would I be able to put into words a coherent answer? All I could come up with is NO I couldn't and the last thing I was someone to say to me is " Mr. Madison Jen, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul".  I started thinking about my values and the best way to put into words what my values really actually are. Could it be that what I thought they were might in fact not really be mine, but instead me trying to please someone else by taking on their values as my own? Or could it b...